a birthday cake for larry

not very pretty. but don't let that stop you. it's really good. and - and this is a good time to pull this one out - it's rustic.

less than six months into dating, 

larry and i stumbled into one of our first

relationship roadblocks: a birthday.

larry's to be precise.

i'm obsessive and i want everything to

be perfect and memorable and,

in sad reality,

i want it to be the best

birthday that anyone has ever had.

ever.

but for larry's birthday,

it was different.

because

the world

the media,

the restaurants

and the

card stores will not

let go of the fact that

cupid claimed rights

to the day

first.

that first year, he insisted

on treating the day

as a normal valentine's day.

it was decided that we would

celebrate

his birthday

the following weekend, but

that he would be planning the 14th

for me.

we went for crab cakes

and he gave me

flowers

and

a card

and it was nice

and delicious.

but it seemed so

wrong.

here it was,

his birthday and

we were surrounded

by kissing couples,

red and pink for miles

and hearts

dangling around us.

so the following year,

a decision was made

that conventional

valentine's day -

sap and all -

was a thing of the past

and instead,

future february 14ths

would be spent at home,

with special meals

and a promise

that behind our door,

it was just a birthday.

but, then, i had to pick

a menu.

it was intricate and i remember

something about taking

a vacation day on the 13th

to prepare

for the meal

and for the cake.

the cake. i had asked him

a month before about his

favorite cake.

a cheesecake, he said.

nothing more specific.

i set to work, scouring

the internet,

books, in which,

the main subject,

was cheesecake.

turning pages away from

the ones that were ordinary,

topped with

apple pie filling,

blueberries,

sliced strawberries,

chocolate shards or

caramel drizzles.

i clicked away from

endless recipes

that had plain

chocolate cookie crumb bottoms

or nothing in the middle

or those made with ricotta.

i transferred my

what-should-we-do-for-is-birthday?

obsession

to finding the perfect cake,

with no idea what i was looking for.

then, three weeks in

(and only a week from his birthday),

i found this recipe

and i knew i would be OK.

i loved that the crust was not

just vanilla wafers

or just chocolate,

that it was both,

with toasted hazelnuts

tossed into the mix.

i loved that it

reached up the sides,

and at the top,

the crumbs were

met with a tangy chocolate

glaze. and i loved that the

sweet filling

was simple,

but given a boost with

hazelnut liqueur

and chopped

chocolate.

on the 12th, it snowed.

heavily.

on the 13th,

i had to dig my

car out

to go shopping.

it was after 2 by the time

i was able to start the

the cake and by 3:30,

i was tired.

and i only had one step done.

it sounds good to have

three main crust components,

but they required:

figuring out how many

vanilla wafers it takes

to get to 1 1/2 cups

of vanilla wafer crumbs,

chopping a bunch of chocolate chips,

toasting, husking, cooling

and chopping hazelnuts,

making and baking

a crust

and cooling the

whole thing completely

before adding the filling.

i had chocolate smeared

on my face,

runaway hazelnuts

on the floor,

and crumbs everywhere.

when it was time to make

the filling, i realized,

i again had to chop

(by hand!) a cup of chocolate

chips. an hour later, when i

opened the oven and saw

a large jagged crack

down the center

of the cheesecake,

i cried.

later, when i tried to make

the glaze to smear on top

(and patch up the hole),

it seized in the bowl.

i melted and melted

until i had chocolate

that moved

and would

spread.

that night,

i crashed

the moment

i hit the bed.

on the 14th, i thought,

new day. birthday.

the cheesecake

was done. it was

chilling,

waiting

patiently for its

turn after the

artichoke appetizer,

seared scallops,

roasted asparagus

and

baked goat cheese mashed potatoes,

which we ate by the fire (three brown tea lights),

on a blanket,

on the floor,

of my tiny studio

apartment

that was not big enough for a

table.

and when the food was away,

i closed the door to

my teeny studio kitchen,

whipped some cream with a

splash of sweet vanilla extract

and a sprinkle of confectioners' sugar,

to dollop on top.

i placed a candle in the

not-so-pretty cake,

lit the end,

and proudly, carefully,

sheepishly, walked into the next

room and sang,

a very off-key happy birthday

to larry.

we sat with our slices,

he, just happy,

me, marveling that in spite

of everything, the crust was

crisp and special, the filling,

ultra-creamy,

the topping a sweet,

but welcome contrast.

and, then, just when i started to

feel like, i did OK,

he had a nice valentine's day-free,

birthday to remember and

i could sleep well,

larry turned to me,

smiled

and said,

i can't believe you know

how to make

whipped cream.

larry's birthday cheesecake

soon, after larry got over his shock that i can make whipped cream, he told me it was the best cheesecake ever and asked if it could become his annual birthday cake. i knew that i would not survive even a second birthday following the instructions as written and played around with them slightly, trying to think it through from beginning to end, in a more logical fashion. if you have a food processor (or a mini one) the crust is a breeze. i also was fortunate enough to work at a magazine where i spent much of my time, writing and researching food tips, several of them pertaining to cheesecake and nuts. i think, after several years and several birthdays (sorry, lar), i finally have it down, using bittersweet chocolate now instead of semi-sweet and extra hazelnut liqueur. this past weekend, the process - with the exception of the fact that i couldn't find the bottom to my springform pan at first - was stress-free. you can certainly make this cake in one day...and broken down this way, it would be much easier than my first time, but i separated it into days. it seems more manageable this way. oh, and i plan to post soon with a lot of the tips.

3/4 cup hazelnuts

1 pkg. (11.5 oz.) bittersweet chocolate morsels, divided

45 vanilla wafers (approximately)

2 Tbs. plus 1 cup granulated sugar, divided

3 Tbs. unsalted butter

3 pkgs. (8 oz.) cream cheese, at room temperature

3 large eggs, at room temperature

1/4 cup plus 1 heaping tablespoon hazelnut liqueur, divided

1/4 cup sour cream

three days before

heat oven to 300˚F. place hazelnuts on rimmed baking sheet. toast, cool and remove husks from nuts.

store in airtight container.

two days before

heat oven to 300˚F. place 1 1/3 cups chocolate morsels in bowl of mini food processor. pulse several times or until small chunks form (see picture above). remove one-quarter chocolate and place in medium size bowl. place remaining three-quarters chocolate in airtight container. place vanilla wafers in bowl of mini food processor; process until finely ground. add to bowl with chocolate. place toasted and husked hazelnuts in bowl of food processor; add 2 Tbs. sugar. pulse 10 times, or just until chopped, making sure not to grind too finely (otherwise the hazelnuts can turn into nut butter). add hazelnut-sugar mixture to bowl. in separate small bowl, melt butter. stir melted butter into crumb-chocolate mixture until coated. place springform pan with a removable bottom on baking sheet. press crumb mixture into bottom and up sides of pan, using bottom of cup to even out crust. bake 15 minutes. place on cooling rack and cool completely. cover tightly with foil.

one day before

heat oven to 350˚F. in bowl of electric mixer, beat cream cheese on medium speed until fluffy; gradually add remaining 1 cup granulated sugar. add eggs, one at a time. add hazelnut liqueur; mix just until combined. stir in reserved chopped chocolate chips. pour into crust. place springform pan on baking sheet. bake 50 minutes to 1 hour, or until set on the edges and slightly jiggly in the middle. turn off oven. using sharp knife, run knife around edge, between crust and pan. place cake (still in pan) back in oven. using wooden spoon, prop open door and let cool 1 hour. remove pan from oven and place on cooling rack. let cool completely. wrap tightly and store in fridge.

two hours before

in bowl, combine remaining hazelnut liqueur and remaining chocolate chips. heat 45 seconds, stirring once, or until melted. stir 1 tbs. sour cream into chocolate mixture until completely combined. stir in remaining sour cream. using an offset spatula, spread chocolate over top of cooled cheesecake. cover and chill until ready to serve.