grilled scallions and scallion vinaigrette (with a sunny side up egg)

since changing jobs,

i've imagined all the things

that i'm going to do,

all the things that i'm going

to cook,

all the things that i'm

going to see and change

about my life.

i thought maybe i'd

finally get around to

making zuni chicken - and being

the kind of person who remembers

to buy chickens two days ahead

of time -

and rick bayless' 27-ingredient

mole. i thought that i'd just make

quick breads and muffins on the

weekends and spend my days

making stock. maybe i'd finally

start canning.

and, i did do some things

that are new, determined to

somehow show my appreciation

that i've regained several hours

each week.

i made a torte for

dinner (a torte! on a

weeknight!) and even added

the two tablespoons of mint

that i usually would have left

out because, ew, mint. i figured,

i'm trying to be a different

person in many other ways,

why can't i make myself be the kind

of person who likes mint?

it was ok.

but, still, i tried.

i stopped myself from insisting

that we go grocery shopping,

like we normally do on sundays

and instead, went to the beach

to walk along the boardwalk on

a surprisingly beautiful day.

and when we walked outside

to catch a dinner reservation,

i took the time to wait as larry

ran back in the house to get the

camera, so that i could snap a few

pictures of the gorgeous sunset.

but, i've remembered something.

i love cooking, probably more than a lot

of people i know. i love devoting time

to making crazy things that most people

would rather buy. i love serving food

to my family and my friends.

but - sometimes.

i'm not a cooking robot with one button

always set to cook. i want to be like other

bloggers i read and those on twitter who

cook from friday night to sunday night,

but i'm not. i still have a job that requires

energy, i still have a family that i want to

see, errands that i have to run, pictures

that have to be hung on the walls of the

house that we've lived in for a year and season

finales that i want to watch sometime near

when they originally aired.

these things - these are things i've

struggled with. i've always felt like if

i was truly as passionate about food

as i claim to be, i would want to live

my life in the kitchen, always. but, i'm coming

to understand that there are different

ways to love cooking and ingredients

and technique. and sometimes, that

means embracing the most simple of

recipes and appreciating them for what

they offer, too.

i've let myself buy store-made turkey

sausages, that larry tossed onto the grill

along with ears of corn. and last night,

when i got out of work way later than

i was supposed to, i embraced

the quick sandwiches that i made with

peppadews, shallots, capers, feta,

oil-packed tuna and lemon, instead

of the more elaborate dinner i had planned.

and, that's why i was drawn to this recipe

from the may issue of bon appetit.

it looked so simple, but so lovely.

and, i'll admit, even though i'm a little

embarrassed by it, i was intrigued

by the idea of microwave-poaching

the eggs. i'm not sure why i even considered

it - i'm a good egg poacher.

(lest you take me as insanely sure of myself,

let me explain -

i'm a pretty poor producer of

runny sunnyside up eggs,

eggs over easy,

pretty-looking hard-cooked eggs,

or even, fluffy scrambled eggs.

but, i can poach eggs, and i wave that flag, proudly.)

however, a lot of people struggle

with poaching eggs and i thought,

hey, if this mug in the microwave version works,

maybe it could be poached eggs

for everyone.

so, i chopped up two scallions, which

i whisked together with lemon juice and the really

exceptional olive oil that we hadn't used since

we bought it on our trip to temecula last year.

i tossed the rest of the scallions on the grill

and placed slices of a baguette under the broiler.

and, then, i cracked an egg into a mug filled with

1/2 cup water. i microwaved for 1 minute, just like

the recipe said. when it beeped, i checked the egg,

which was clearly still liquidy. i gave it 25 seconds

more and tried to gently pour the egg onto a slotted

spoon, before watching the white, still liquid, start

to slither out. i gave the mixture 25 seconds more.

again, still liquid, but i could see that the yellow

was more than set.

there was egg in the sink.

i had an egg ready to go in another mug

of water. for some reason, the egg shells

were on the counter. the scallions - charred

and on plates - were getting

cold and i was cursing. without thinking,

i turned the grill pan back on, and tossed fresh

eggs over the ridges, watching the whites run,

and continuing to curse. but, then, the whites

set and i gently lifted the bottom to make sure

it wasn't sticking. this "quick" dinner was

actually going to be ok.

i arranged the scallions on two plates.

i smeared a bit of ricotta over the toasted

bread and placed them next to the scallions.

when the eggs were ready, i carefully removed

them from the impractical cooking device and

used them to top the bread. and then i drizzled

both plates with a bit of the vinaigrette.

even, after all the cursing, they looked quite pretty.

pretty enough that i

insisted that we go outside,

so that larry could hold the plate

while i snapped pictures,

ignoring the neighbor's dog

barking up a storm at his

crazy new neighbors

who step outside in the evening

to take pictures of their dinner.

and, while as usual with eggs,

i could take or leave

the surprisingly set whites

surrounding a runny yolk,

i loved the seared scallions and the really simple

vinaigrette. i think that i

would enjoy them even more,

under a thick piece of pan-roasted fish.

but, that?

that would have been too complicated.

grilled scallions and and scallion vinaigrette (with a sunny side up egg)

adapted from bon appetit magazine

i think the stars of this recipe are the grilled scallions and the vinaigrette. the eggs were fine, but i think we all know how to make an egg. even though i coped by cooking the eggs on the griddle, feel free to make them in a pan, poach them or, i would think, even scrambled and served over toast would be nice. besides cooking the eggs on the griddle, i made a few changes: i increased the quantity of chopped scallions in the vinaigrette from one to two and used half a lemon, instead of just 1 teaspoon of juice.

also, i chose to toss a few pieces of a baguette under the broil for a couple of minutes (checking on them occasionally), until just golden and firm and then smeared them with fresh ricotta that we had in the fridge. the eggs sat nicely on top - but that's your choice.

2 bunches scallions

3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

1/2 large juicy lemon, juiced

eggs, cooked to your liking (how many? i ate one, larry ate two - your choice)

toasted baguettes slices topped with ricotta cheese (if you like that kind of thing)

using sharp knife, thinly slice 2 scallions; run your knife over the sliced scallions a couple times to chop a bit smaller. place in bowl; whisk in olive oil and lemon juice. season gently with kosher salt and cracked black pepper. set aside.

place remaining scallions on a plate; drizzle with remaining olive oil and toss to coat. season gently with kosher salt and cracked black pepper. heat a grill pan (or skillet) over medium-high heat. place scallions on hot pan and cook 5 minutes, or until tender and slightly charred, flipping occasionally. divide scallions between two plates.

place eggs and bread (if using) on plates, if desired. drizzle with scallion vinaigrette.

roasted cauliflower, smoked paprika and cheddar frittata

two confessions:

first. i've been in kind of a

weird place lately.

i'm not sure if it's extreme

exhaustion brought on

by this commute that i thought

i could handle, a hint

of unhappiness in one or two

aspects of my life or as i

suspect, a combination of both.

usually, when i feel off,

cooking helps me get back on track.

it gives me something to focus on,

something that i know i can handle

and something that i can at least

in some way, predict the final outcome of -

all unlike uncertain times in life.

but, lately, even the idea of cooking

feels daunting. i imagine a lot of

chopping, sauteing while having

to keep a watchful eye, leftovers

that i need to find a container for

and aching feet.

i'm not used to this and it scares

me that i'm losing the one

thing that i've always relied on.

if my interest in cooking,

in researching recipes,

in putting a homemade dinner

on the table every night

is wavering,

what's next?

so there's that.

and the second secret: i use cooking spray.

it is uncool for so many reasons.

it's a chemical that i'm spraying all over

my food. it's a weird-flavored thing that

i'm spraying all over my food. but,

really, to me it's necessary.

i grew up in a

home that used oil and butter sparingly,

cream, never. as an adult, i've reached

a compromise between the responsible

calorie-saving side and the culinary-trained

side, using a combination of olive oil and

spray while learning which recipes don't

actually need oil at all. it's something

that i've always been hesitant to write about.

what will other people think?

but, if i was able to admit to you that i'm

doubting myself in some ways, i think

it's only fair that i cop to buying the largest

cooking spray that the store carries.

go ahead, judge me.

in the meantime,

i'll tell you about this frittata.

for my birthday, in august,

my mom gave me two great cookbooks:

good to the grain and plenty.

i've read both cover to cover several

times, but as is my new attitude apparently,

it all seemed so involved, such a commitment,

but, still so pretty, so tempting.

i've been torn.

last week,

in need of comfort, something

that required a low skill level and

a recipe that used a lot of ingredients

i already had in the house,

i landed on the smoky frittata in plenty.

it was an odd choice for me.

egg dishes don't entirely thrill me -

they're always so...eggy.

but this one had

golden cauliflower,

smoked paprika,

dijon mustard -

all ingredients that could

easily sway to me to overlook

the eggs (i was the kid who in

a mexican restaurant, ordered

a dish she had never heard of, with

ingredients she was so-so about,

just because it came with guacamole).

and, even better:

i knew i could handle it.

i would roast the cauliflower instead

of boiling, then browning in a pan.

i certainly could handle whisking

together a bunch of things in a bowl

and i was pretty sure that i could

bake the puffy omelet without burning it,

making a mockery of my

years in the kitchen in the process.

it felt good to drive home from

work, distracting myself on the ride

with ideas for the dinner, ultimately

deciding to use two mini cast iron

skillets instead of one large one. it

was nice to have a plan,

to walk into the kitchen, set the oven

to 400˚f and set to work cutting

the cauliflower into small florets.

it was a relief to realize that even

though i may feel inadequate a lot

lately, i still remembered to adjust

the racks to the top and bottom of

the oven and to divide the florets

evenly among two baking sheets

coated with cooking spray to

ensure that they browned

and didn't steam.

and while they were in the oven,

i changed around the rest of the recipe,

opting to whisk together all of the

flavor components first so that i

could taste and adjust,

before stirring in the raw egg.

i reduced the creme fraiche,

added horseradish, eliminated the smoky

mozzarella, increased the cheddar,

forgot about the chives (oops)

and added a few grains of smoked

salt that i purchased in temecula.

i think that's it.

and when the cauliflower came

out of the oven - and we resisted

the urge to just eat them all, as is - i

divided them between the cast iron

skillets and poured in the egg mixture,

sure that i would have extra.

i didn't. and they were really cute.

they looked so tiny,

hanging out over the flame on the stove,

but after the full 12 minutes in the oven,

placed on two plates they looked

beautiful - and huge.

the forkfuls,

alongside an arugula and apple salad,

were comforting and reassuring -

a promise that even though i'm still

not so willing to face

the stove with the same tenacity

i have in the past,

when i finally grab a knife,

it will be ok.

roasted cauliflower, smoked paprika and cheddar frittata

adapted from plenty

i will admit that even though i loved the look of the small cast iron pans, they produced frittatas that were huge - for me (larry was fine with the size). i was able to eat about half before i decided that i had had enough. the good news was that the omelet held up surprisingly well and was a nice lunch the next day. while it's true that i changed many elements, i think i still was able to maintain the smoky, cheesy essence of the dish.

plenty is written for a british kitchen - celsius, grams, etc. i converted to the best of my ability in this recipe.

1 medium head cauliflower, cored

1 tablespoon olive oil

3 tablespoons creme fraiche

2 heaping tablespoons dijon mustard

1 tablespoon prepared grated white horseradish

2 teaspoons smoked paprika

4 ounces sharp cheddar cheese, grated and divided

6 large eggs

one pinch large grain smoked salt, ground fine with a mortar and pestle (optional)

adjust racks to top and bottom thirds of oven. heat oven to 400˚f.

cut cauliflower into small-medium florets; place in bowl. drizzle with olive oil; sprinkle with salt and pepper, toss to combine. transfer cauliflower to two foil-lined baking sheets coated with cooking spray. if cauliflower looks dry, drizzle with olive oil or coat with cooking spray.

roast cauliflower 20-25 minutes, flipping cauliflower once and rotating baking sheets from top rack to bottom, or until golden brown and tender.

reduce oven temperature to 375˚f. place one rack back in the center of the oven.

meanwhile, in bowl, whisk together creme fraiche, mustard, horseradish, smoked paprika and 2 ounces grated cheddar cheese. taste and adjust, if necessary. in separate bowl (i used the cauliflower bowl), whisk eggs. pour into creme fraiche mixture and whisk to completely combine. season with a touch of salt and pepper, if desired.

coat one 10" cast iron skillet or two 5" cast iron skillets with cooking spray. evenly divide cauliflower between the two skillets to mostly cover the bottom of the skillet (i had extra, but roasted cauliflower never lasts very long in this house, so i wasn't worried). carefully divide egg mixture between the two skillets.

set skillet(s) over flame(s) set to medium. let cook 5 minutes, or until the bottom begins to set.

place on baking sheet. sprinkle with remaining cheese and smoked salt, if using.

carefully transfer baking sheet to oven. bake 8-12 minutes, or until the mixture is completely set. let sit 2-3 minutes before serving.