kick back and indulge - shoes optional

we've done mother's day
every which way in the past:
we've spent many a celebration at
at a nice restaurant,
enjoying dinner with both my
mom and grandmother.
we've toasted to all moms
at an italian restaurant
in boston,
on the evening before
blair's graduation
from grad school
and we've gone
to hotels for their
buffets, filled with large
chilled shrimp,
crab legs
and omelets to order.

but, as most often is the case,
the best celebrations have
been at home,
with our shoes kicked off,
wearing whatever,
eating food that we've prepared
and having the luxury
of talking and laughing
as loudly as we wish.

that's how we spent sunday:
waking up early and tossing
on jeans,
drinking coffee on the way
down and then perching ourselves
at the island in my mom's
kitchen, telling stories,
talking and discussing
the dishes we were about to
eat in a way that would make
one think we were feeding 20,
not six.
as my mom and i debated the benefits
of baking both her dishes
at the same time,
i made a salad,
feeding erin a nibble of each
item - a square of beet,
a crumble of feta, a broken
toasted walnut, watching her
face for reaction - and my mom
fielded two calls from
blair regarding the bagels.

my grandmother came -
she exchanged large hanging
potted plants with my mom
and before we ate,
both sisters tried on dresses
belonging to the other one,
for rehearsal dinners and
college formals that they
had coming up this week,
sampling different shoes
and different pieces
of jewelry from my mom, me
and each other, turning yet another
get together into a fashion show.

and in the background,
the house began to smell
warm, like bubbling cheese
and sweet caramelizing cinnamon,
until the timer went off,
everyone changed back into
the clothing they came in
and we sat around my mom's
large square table, somehow
just the right size for us and
all of the food.

the savory:
a recipe that my mom makes
about once a year - because really
there are few ways to rationalize
baking the casserole more often
that that. her best friend,
judy, gave us the recipe,
originally obtained from judy's
husband, alan's side of the family.
my mom has made it for
new year's day mornings
and
special occasion breakfasts,
and last year, i made it for
a monster brunch that we hosted.
white bread (the only time we ever
actually have white bread),
butter,
eggs,
milk,
sharp cheddar cheese
and spices
sit together overnight and then
puff until golden and bubbling
in the oven.
it is rich, eggy,
gorgeously cheesy
and with a crowd,
there will be none leftover.
while i'm sometimes hesitant
to endorse a dish,
thinking, i know i love
it, but that doesn't mean
you will,
i think with this one i have
to say, you won't regret it.

the sweet:
a new dish this year,
that i must say, my mom was
very excited about.

it was a recipe from paula deen -
who hysterically,
my mother, who is probably
the healthiest cook i know,
is in love with (so much
so that i have very seriously
been tasked with getting paula
to attend an important upcoming
birthday of my mom's. i was given a four
year head start for this mission
and about
8 months in, i started to panic
that my mom was very serious
and paula, not so much up
for coming. when i mercifully
ended up at a press
event with paula, promoting
her sons' cookbook,
i accosted the poor woman -
along with her husband, michael
and sons, jamie and bobby, to boot -
with a birthday card
and begged for signatures,
birthday messages
and good wishes.
they really are as nice
as they seem and paula,
who had kicked off her uncomfortable
high heels in the middle
of what was formerly
david burke and donatella,
grabbed my pen,
told me i was a good daughter,
asked me to hold her glass
and obliged.
i held onto the card for four
months and then realized that
if i waited three years until
the aforementioned important birthday -
still, in present day, over one year away -
i would lose the card.
so i presented it 36 months early
and it is now framed in her kitchen.).

wow. did you get all that?
anyway, i believe that it is
her adoration for paula
that makes her try recipes
that by any other food network
celeb (yes, sandra lee, i'm looking
at you), would probably
be ignored.

the mother's day experiment
was the ultimate coffee cake,
frozen, thawed ready-to-rise rolls
are layered in a bundt pan
with cinnamon, pecans and a
whole mess of other ingredients.
once covered with a tea towel,
it's left to rise overnight - my mom
confessed
to rushing to look at it
in the morning and feeling
extreme excitement when she saw
that it had risen high. see,
this is where i get it from.

once baked, it is like the most
wonderful cinnamon bun
you have ever had,
minus all of the work.
even better, no fussy cutting
or slicing, you can just pull
apart the rounds with your
hands or a fork.
because my mom followed the recipe
pretty closely, except
for adding raisins and sprinkling
some pecans on the bottom of the
pan before adding the rolls,
i'm just going to give you
the link here.
if you have any questions,
just ask.
she's on standby.

judy's cheddar egg bake
because i'm a big fan of make-aheads, i strongly advise preparing this the night before and storing the dish in the fridge. take the casserole out about an hour before you plan to bake and then let it come up to room temperature.

10 slices white bread, crusts removed
unsalted butter
2 cups milk
8 large eggs, beaten
16 ounces sharp cheddar cheese
1 teaspoon dry mustard
1 teaspoon hot sauce

butter bread. cube bread slices. in mixing bowl, combine bread cubes, milk, beaten eggs, cheddar cheese, dry mustard and hot sauce.

transfer mixture to a 9 x 13 buttered casserole dish. cover and place in the fridge. let sit at least 2 hours or preferably overnight.

heat oven to 350˚f. bake 45 minutes or until casserole is puffed, the top is golden brown and the mixture is baked through. it's great with a few drops of hot sauce on top.

good for what ails you (and a great gift, too)

i'm having one of those

evenings

in which, 

i'm out of sorts.

i've had a perfectly nice

couple of days.

excellent in fact,

enjoying shabu shabu

and a beverly hills 90210

marathon

with jenn

(think: pilot),

then sushi with my family

and a cozy day today,

swapping stories

of our first memories

with my mom and sister

while hiding out

under blankets.

(my first memories, 

by the way,

involved:

crackers that i wasn't allowed

to eat thanks to a severe childhood

egg allergy,

the wooden spoon on a

vanilla-chocolate dixie cup,

and one i forgot to mention earlier,

shaking a baby food jar 

filled with cream,

to make butter.

all food, my mom 

pointed out.)

it was perfectly lovely .

and yet, 

when i got home tonight,

i wanted to

do nothing more

tonight than curl up

with

a blanket

and my sulky self.

thank goodness,

i remembered i hadn't

yet told you about these

sesame cookies that 

are long overdue for

a write-up.

they're cute, sweet, easy,

and i'll give them an 

extra point

for getting me off the couch.

i made a batch weeks ago,

when we were visiting

our friends,

colleen and christian,

in philadelphia.

the last time we stayed

with them,

i brought a basket

filled with tropical, 

hard-to-find-fruits -

a gift obviously brought on by

my growing fascination

with our themed thursday nights.

this time, i thought about

it for 30 seconds 

and said,

spare them the drama,

bake cookies.

and i knew which ones.

after my last 

need-to-make-cookies obsession,

i had been left with

a second place contender,

these tahini-laced spheres.

--

come to think of it,

i was cranky the 

day that i made these.

i had to be at work early -

like six in the morning early -

when i left later that afternoon 

it was raining

so hard that i felt 

forced to sit in car

for 15 minutes before

daring to drive

and then when i finally

got home,

i realized i had

left my cell phone in the car

and i had

already removed my soaking

wet pants and sneakers.

i briefly considered 

waiting for the weather

to clear, grabbing a basket,

and picking

up a bunch of

kiwiberries.

but i took a rare nap,

watched some bad

daytime tv

and was good to go.

the next day, i was 

relieved to arrive

at their doorstep

sans a prickly pear.

--

these cookies, luckily,

don't take much convincing.

butter and eggs are creamed

together with sugar

and tahini,

then blended with flour.

once chilled,

you roll into balls,

dunk in sesame seeds

and bake until golden.

simple. 

and funk-minimizing.

they're relatives of a

peanut butter cookie,

for sure, but,

they have their

own unique creamy-crunchiness,

and

the hulled

seeds on the outside

provide a unique

coating.

if you've ever tasted

tahini on its own, 

you know

that its, well...rather,

um...it makes peanut

butter seem like a refreshing

glass of milk.

here, the butter and sugar

certainly change the

stick to the roof of 

your mouth factor,

but freshly baked,

i think they're still

a little...thick.

i was happily surprised

the next day,

when i discovered that

cooling, sitting

and settling

does wonders

to mellow the texture.

also, lucky for me tonight,

still cranky, yet

at least not mournful

that i've wasted away 

the hours,

is that while the recipe

says the cookies

are good for five days,

i've learned that

you can enjoy one,

three weeks

(yes, three - don't judge me)

later, 

texture and flavor, 

still in tact,

and perfect for a little

pick-me-up.

sesame seed cookies

adapted from gourmet magazine

make sure that you stir the tahini very, very well to help incorporate the oil. if you have to, dump it into a bowl to stir before measuring. one thing that i considered with these, was removing a couple tablespoons of granulated sugar from the body of the cookie and instead of tossing it with the sesame seeds before rolling. if you try it, let me know. also, the original recipe, created for the holidays, instructed to coat the cookies in luster dust. it was a little fancy for my needs. plus, while i'm willing to snack on these, i have issues with the warning posted with the original recipe: "luster dust is nontoxic. however, the fda recommends that it be used for decorative purposes only."

1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 stick (1/2 cup) unsalted butter, softened

1/2 cup sugar

1/2 cup well-stirred tahini

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/3 cup sesame seeds, preferably hulled

in bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder and salt.

in bowl of an electric mixer on medium-high speed, beat together butter and sugar 3 minutes, or until pale and fluffy. add tahini and vanilla extract; beat 30 seconds more, or until completely blended, pausing to scrape the bottom of the bowl. reduce speed to low; add flour mixture in 2 batches, mixing until a crumbly dough forms. transfer dough to a sheet of plastic wrap and press into a disk. chill dough 1 hour, or until firm.

arrange racks in upper and lower thirds of oven. heat oven to 350˚f. line 2 large baking sheets with parchment paper.

transfer sesame seeds to small bowl. 

roll dough into 1-inch balls. roll balls, one at a time, in seeds to coat; arrange 2 inches apart on prepared baking sheets. bake 12-15 minutes, or until cookies are puffed and starting to crack, switching position of sheets halfway through. cool 10 minutes on pan; transfer to rack and cool completely.